My Three Sons-Cue Goofy Music & Shoe Animation

One of the cool things about living for a bit in life is that you find out that stuff happened like it was supposed to, in spite of you.

I had one son, I wanted a daughter- a daughter, all pink and sweet good-smelly.

My second child stuck his thumb in his mouth and announced his boyhood with no reservations while still in the womb.

When the ultrasound let us know that my third child was another boy I was disappointed…for about two seconds.

In the succeeding few years, between son #1 and son #3, I’d discovered some things about myself: calling 911, blood running down the face, extreme sports- that, I can handle. Princess parties?  Not so much.

The first time my sweet little baby girl wiggled her head at me from the top of her neck and spurted out, “What-ev-er!” I swear, I'd probably just knock that head right into the living room. I am so not cut-out to parent a girl. However, I am putting my order in, right now, for girl-grandbabies. Primarily, ‘cause I can love ‘em and send ‘em home.

“Sure, Honey, we can paint your toenails…

…there ya go, all them little piggies are 

Rockin’ Red,

now run on home, 

Grand’s gotta take a nap!”

I love my boys. Let me tell you about them.

I’ve had three-one was born in Georgia, one in Oklahoma and one in California (which tells you something about me, I’ve been a gypsy.)  They are the coolest thing that’s ever happened to me…and they’ve created some of the hardest stuff that I‘ve been through.

The oldest is 15 and he won’t show up here much-he finds this embarrassing and embarrassing him just isn't worth it, I value our relationship too much.

One is 4 and the other is 3. The two youngest can not read and therefore are oblivious to the fact that I am writing about them, by the time they are old enough to know and care (try, at about 40) I will be long dead and all they will be able to do, to retaliate, is to kick my tombstone. So, there!

I also have two step-children, a step-son who will be 21 and a step-daughter who will be 18, both very soon. Which brings us to another point-I, very obviously, do not always play with a full deck. Our other, older kids were fully functional, they were automated-they WIPED themselves- and we started over. Seriously, totally over.

My son was 10 when the first of the younger two was born.

I love this picture for a lot of reasons and one is that Oldest Child ADORED Toy Story when he was little (it came out, originally, the year that he was born- 1995) and here he is, 14 or 15 years later,with his two LIVE Buzz and Woody dolls.

Middle Child and Wild Child (you have no idea, words can not express his Wild Childness- don't let his cuteness fool you, if he weren't so cute, I'd of already pinched his little head off. :) ) also LOVE Buzz and Woody and it’s been sorta surreal watching the whole process over again.

The thing is, is that I was totally prepared for being an OLD mom. All my friends, when Oldest Child was born, were like me, in their mid to late twenties. Over a decade later, when I had Middle Child and Wild Child, I was totally okay with being the only mom on the first grade playground pushing a walker, I'd thought about it and prepared myself for it...

( In fact, I am a better parent as an older parent. I'm much more laid back and easy going, I'm a lot more stable in a lot of ways and more comfortable in my own skin, all of which means that I do not commit one of "A-Girl's Unpardonable Sins of Parenting" -confusing my identity with the identities of my kids- nearly as much as I used to.)

...and you know what? It's not gonna happen. Something happened in the succeeding 10 years that I wasn't aware of-women, having babies, got older. Now, most of my friends are old fogies like me, trying desperately to juggle wrinkle cream and diaper rash cream. (Lord help us, sometimes we forget which cream goes where. :) )

I'm not sure why it happened but it happened. My recent twenty-year high school reunion was overrun with little ankle-biters and surprised middle-aged adults,

"I just knew 

I'd be the only one here with small kids."  

Nope, not today Jethro, today we’ve ALL lost our minds.